I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
