I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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