we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Randomize
