no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
