I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
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