Whoa Z and x make the same sound
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize
