Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
