As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
