And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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