i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
