That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
i out mim tonsoeep
Randomize
