And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
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