Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(+65): View more from

He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?

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(205): View more from Alabama

Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one

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(360): View more from Washington

you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.

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(406): View more from Montana

I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.

(1-406): View more from Montana

You're so romantic.

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(214): View more from Texas

I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay

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(419): View more from Ohio

Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities

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(404): View more from Georgia

Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend

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(408): View more from California

just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation

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