your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
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