"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Randomize
