no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
