you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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