im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize
