is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize
