So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize