In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
love makes seman taste better
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
