Quick, to the slutcave!
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Randomize
