I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
im about as happy as oj after his trial
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Randomize
