So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Randomize
