i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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