i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
