Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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