Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
