I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Randomize
