Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize
