You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize
