I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
i permit you to call me
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
you told grandpa to call you daddy
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
My penis needs a shock collar
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
