Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Randomize
