I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
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