well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Two ladies just showed up with my fucking purse. It was in the fucking street. I'm a train wreck. As a financial advisor, this shouldn't happen. I should be an adult.
I have bruises all over my body. Seriously, I'm a train wreck. I'm too damn old for hangovers like this.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
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