hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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