Sponge bath it is.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Randomize