with your own penis?
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
