dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
