Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
