Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize
