they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
