Banned from zoo.
Again?
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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