So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
