By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
