Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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