Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I wish there were birth control emojis
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
