I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Randomize
