So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Randomize
