thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
