Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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